Dresden vs Potter
by Caffeinated Star
Summary: Because the main character never gets shot. Make sure you've read all the books!


**Just finished reading the last Dresden book awhile ago. Anyway, this popped into my head. I was bored, what can I say? For anyone on my alerts for Call Me Lucky, I've discontinued it for good, because I decided I hated it. Anyway, enjoy! Reviews are welcome.**

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**Dresden vs. Potter**

Harry Potter frowned and rubbed at his old scar, feeling a headache coming on. The older man sitting across from him seemed just as pained.

"So let me get this straight," Harry started. "Your name is Harry. You're a wizard from some other dimension… place… thing… and after you got _shot, _you ended up here?"

Harry Dresden nodded wearily. "Yeah, yeah, I know. It sounds crazy, but most of the things that happen to me do. I mean, you should've seen the time when I was helping my brother out and he asked me a favor, and somehow I ended up in a movie set that shot porno films. And two of the girls there were _vampires - _"

He cut off sharply when he realized the younger Harry was looking a bit skeptical.

"Okay kid, maybe you don't believe me - "

Harry Potter interrupted. "You think that's _bad? _I had some evil, Dark Lord obsessed with killing me! I was on the run for almost a year! And I had to find a way to kill the damn guy, because he had made himself nearly immortal - "

"Oh, yeah? Well my mentor summoned a stupid demon that almost killed me, and then they brought me before the Council after I defended myself and killed him. Only, they put me under this thing that was basically probation and some crazy Warden was following me around - "

"Ha! I was put on trial for defending myself against soul-sucking monsters and they almost snapped my wand!"

Dresden burst out laughing. "Kid, you have no idea how wrong that sounds."

Potter scowled at him. "Magic wand, _magic wand_," he emphasized. "Honestly, whoever's up there is completely against me."

Before he could start angsting, Dresden put in, "Been there, done that. Nothing's changed."

"Have _you _been tied to a grave by an evil wizard?"

"Have _you _killed a Faerie Queen?"

"We don't even have Fairy Queens!" Potter exclaimed, frustrated. "And again, what the hell are you doing here?"

"I told you I got shot - "

"You should be dead!"

"Are you sure you aren't?" countered Dresden.

"My house is right behind me, and unless my girlfriend is dead, too, I don't think so," he snapped.

"Harry!"

The two whipped their heads around to see a bushy haired girl rushing over. "Harry, I've got some news!"

"Hermione, this isn't the best time," Potter tried, but he could not stop the clever witch from honing in on Dresden.

"Who are you? Are you from another book?" Hermione asked, excitement bubbling up inside her.

"What? What are you talking about? Is your friend crazy?" Dresden asked irritated, addressing the last to Potter.

"No, not usually," Potter replied absently. "Hermione, what do you want?"

"I've found out something! Apparently, we're all characters in a book, and we're not real! And I think he -" she waved a hand at Dresden "- is another character, from another world, which is why I was able to figure this out. I can see outside! By the way, you're dead, your author killed you off," she added to him.

"What?" shouted Dresden indignantly. "Look you lunatic, my name's Harry Dresden, and I am not dead or a character from a book. I just got shot. There's a big difference. And even if I am a fictional character, there's no way my author would kill me off! That's such a cop out!"

"He probably decided you were too annoying," Potter sneered.

"Well, what about you? What did your author do?" Dresden demanded, crossing his arms.

"I saved the whole Wizarding World, got a hot girlfriend who I - well, you don't need to know that. I'm famous as hell, and can probably be the Head of the Auror Department in the next three years."

"Yeah? Well, I'm a Warden. And the word Auror is stupid."

"The word Warden makes you sound like you work for a prison, great job."

"Guys, guys! You're missing the point!" Hermione said frantically.

They ignored her, continuing to bicker.

"That's it!" Potter said, shooting up, after a particular injuring comment. "I can't deal with this. I'm going to bed."

Hermione took one look at Dresden, before following Potter.

Harry sighed. "Well," he said glumly. "Guess this should teach me not to get shot with bullets anymore."


End file.
